Chapter 19: Where am I? - My K-Pop Experience

Welcome to ARMYLand.

They were everywhere...

Dancing, singing, walking, running, standing, sitting, eating, chatting, waiting...

I had paid for a journey to hell with no guaranty of refund...and return.

“That's K pop? I’m out of here”.

As I turned around to leave, I remembered all the time and the resources I had (wasted) spent in preparation for this day. Leaving now was not an option.

You know, that place was not my comfort zone.

I am the type of person you would never see around as long as my fridge is full, the electricity is working fine, the boiler’s running okay and the WIFI is good. You won’t see me. At all.

So, being in a place full of people and having for mission to give leaflets about the potential misconduct happening in the entertainment industry, possibly including the group they’ve paid to see...

I had seen a “Last will and testament” document at the post office a week earlier...

Maybe a sign.

Anyways,

I went through the security check and convinced myself to walk around the arena in an attempt to be more positive.

The rhythms of my steps were perfectly synchronised with my “positive” thoughts.

Step 1 + “I’m going home”, step 2+”I’m out”, step 3+”game over”, step 4 + “I’m screwed”, etc.

That walk was not helping at all.

I wanted to go home but thought “Let me go use the toilet first”.

Oh, the queue...

Ain’t moving for like 20 minutes...pure agony.

As I was thinking “Should I just leave now?”, my phone rung.

Mum...Oh

I completely forgot to pray for my life before taking the phone call.

• Kitania: Hello mum

• Mum: Hi dear, how are you?

• Kitania: Um, I am good...

• Mum: What’s wrong? And where are you?

• Kitania: *sweating* Um, mum...I am-

• Mum: Oh, you’re at the library?

• Kitania: Uh?

• Mum: I’ll leave you then. Don’t be late for the bible study tonight.

• Kitania: Okay, see you mum.

• Mum: Bye

Yooooooooo

Surely my time was not today.

Surely an angel had traded the bombastic noise with silence.

I don’t know but it gave me a bit of energy to walk to another “toilet-line” to which I had to wait for another 15 minutes.

"There's even rush hours for toilet lines? Or maybe ARMYs feeling a bit stressed to meet their group BTS?" I thought.

I wish I had taken some cleaning kit with me... I won’t describe the smell and the cleanliness. I wanted to pray but "unable" to kneel, I remained standing:

“God, I am here and really scared. I don’t want to go home like that, please help me, in the name of your Son Jesus Christ, Amen”.

As I left those dirty toilets, I could not feel any power flowing through my veins, neither was my voice clearer and nor was I more confident. I was only resting on the thought that God was with me and would bring me out alive and safe.

I took out the leaflets and started to give them away...

“The fans were really kind and polite. I would ask them 'Are you here for the concert?', they would reply by yes or no. After, I would show them the notes and explain what it was about, then they would happily take them and say, 'thank you'. After 1h30min, I had less than 40 papers remaining out of 400.” JimiJymy (Online forum)

I was relieved to be soon finished and happy that my restaurant scenario would be soon approaching.

Unfortunately, it was two grumpy security agents that came asking me questions…

“I heard a loud voice, I turned my head it was two fans coming with two security agents.....They told me that what I was saying were strong accusations that could be considered as slandering. They've also told me that they've met BTS and the crew and they seemed to be really nice guys. They took the remaining papers I had and asked to take my bag to search it. “ JimiJymy (Online forum)

While one of them was talking, I turned my head to look at the other agent searching my bag. When he looked at the plastic where I’d put the notepads in, I was about to tell him ‘You can take it and throw it in the bin if you like. It was for BTS anyways’…but suddenly there was like a ball of fear preventing my voice to come out…If it was BTS’ themselves throwing them into the bin, I wouldn’t have cared that much because that would have been their problem. But just the thought of seeing somebody else throwing them away…All this hard work of cutting each and every single paper…I didn’t want to see so I turned my head to be face to face with an upset ARMY.

“As one of the agents was searching my bag, one of the fans that watched the video started talking to me (you could feel that she was angry, frustrated and about to burst into tears) 'Yes, it's true that you’ve said we should wait after the concert to watch the video. Yes, it's true that you’ve said that there are certain things that will not be appropriate to certain people. But, here, there are a lot of young people; you shouldn't give it to them. We are here to have a nice time and you are.....'Etc. I was just listening to her, nodding and saying 'Yes, yes I understand'. Then, the other security agent asked me if I was part of any organisation 'No, I am a student', 'Are you here with other people *looking around*?', 'No, I'm alone'. He looked at me like 'Is she real?’ They then gave me back my bag and asked me to leave the place. I said 'Ok. Thank you very much. Bye.' I was disappointed that I couldn't give all the papers but I realised that it was God's timing to tell me that 'You've done your part. It's time to leave'. “ (JimiJymy - Online forum)

If I hadn't left at this precise moment I would have missed my train...and would have been late for bible studies.

It’s when I was on train that I realised the biblical flashcards were still in my bag.

I felt relieved but would later shred them to pieces...

To know why, you’ll have to wait a bit :)

~ My K-Pop Experience: How My Experience Shaped My Personal Journey as a Christian (#19) ~